So, I was talking to a woman recently. Was a "non-law" conversation but she knew I was a lawyer. She was explaining her idea of "nice," which in essence was ... a person smiles and facilitates happiness. 

And she asked me, "Are you a nice lawyer?" 

I proceeded to explain to her (in so many words) that while I am generally professional and kind it doesn't necessarily follow that I will avoid confrontation and being "Dr. No" doing something perceived as "not nice" when it is called for to get where a client needs to go. 

It seems to me that niceness is an overvalued quality in the modern world. We have a lot of people smiling at each other without meaning it. We are connected, it seems, but how are we doing with real communication that moves the ball? But I digress ... 

Two stories that demonstrate two different looks at niceness: 

First, years ago, I was involved in a contentious construction case. The opposing lawyer was obnoxious and repeatedly tried to provoke my clients during their depositions. My client said to me before the other side's deposition: "He was an ass to us; I want you to be an ass to him." I responded, "He is trying to be an ass. I am trying to win." 

Second story: During a hearing a judge was telling the parties his philosophy of how he wanted the parties to simply "open their files" rather than engaging in traditional discovery practice with objections. Respectfully, I am not going to do that. It might make the judge's job easier, but it is not my job to make the judge's, or any one's job easier. My job is to represent my client, even if others around me think I am not being "nice" or cooperative. Judges will often appeal to professionalism, but I wonder how they would feel if they were the client. 

Bottom line: Being liked is overrated. Doing right is undervalued.